Real men

Bags

Super Active Member
The real meaning behind the abbreviations in personal ads!


FIRST THE ADS FROM WOMEN:-
(the men are below)
Size 10 = Size 12 at least.
40-ish = 48
Adventurer = Has had more partners than you ever will
Athletic = Flat-chested
Average looking = Ugly
Beautiful = Pathological liar
Contagious Smile = Bring your penicillin
Educated = College dropout
Emotionally Secure = Medicated
Feminist = Fat; ball buster
Free spirit = Substance user
Friendship first = Trying to live down reputation as slut
Fun = Annoying
Gentle = Comatose
Good Listener = Borderline Autistic
New-Age = All body hair, all the time
Old-fashioned = Lights out, missionary position only
Open-minded = Desperate
Outgoing = Loud
Passionate = Randy
Poet = Depressive Schizophrenic
Professional = Real Witch
Redhead = Shops the Clairol section
Reubenesque = Grossly Fat
Romantic = Looks better by candle light
Voluptuous = Very Fat
Weight proportional to height = Hugely Fat
Wants Soul mate = One step away from stalking
Widow = Nagged first husband to death
Young at heart = Toothless crone



THE MALE SIDE OF THE LIST
40-ish = 52 and looking for a 25-yr-old
Athletic = Sits on the couch and watches Sky Sport
Average looking = Unusual hair growth on ears, nose, & back
Educated = Will always treat you like an idiot
Free Spirit = Sleeps with your sister
Friendship first = As long as friendship involves nudity
Fun = Good with a remote and a six pack
Good looking = Arrogant
Honest = Pathological Liar
Huggable = Overweight, more body hair than a bear
Like to cuddle = Insecure, overly dependent
Mature = Until you get to know him
Open-minded = Wants to sleep with your sister but she's not interested
Physically fit = I spend a lot of time in front of mirror admiring myself
Poet = Has written on a toilet wall
Spiritual = Once went to church with his grandmother on Easter Sunday
Stable = Occasional stalker, but never arrested
Thoughtful = Says "Please" when demanding a beer
 

Jefferson'86

Actual or Former Legionnaire
Legionnaire
So..
Lessons learned then.

Old fat Former Legionaniare with bad teeth, bad knee, and bad attitude seeks young sexy 20 something to use, abuse and exchange body fluids and then exchange lies and never see each other again....


Naah, can't be asked....

Jeff
 

Tonyus

Hyper Active Member
Since you didn't mention male or female (and goat or sheep at 20 is not young), take a look at gitane's intro.



Am I in any danger...? I'll start packing anyway...
 

Jefferson'86

Actual or Former Legionnaire
Legionnaire
No blokes or fat birds...



Tony, no harm mate, quite funny, no offense taken....

Could you stand near the window at about 21:00 Zulu please...........
 

Tonyus

Hyper Active Member
OK. I thought it would be better outside while holding a flag (don't want to mess up the paintwork in the house, window glass needs a change).
 
You guys....for all would be Ffl.....seems we get a lot on here telling us how physically fit or how they are so buff....this is what I imagine from Bags list...

Physically fit = I spend a lot of time in front of mirror admiring myself
Head looks like pin and no neck.
 

Tonyus

Hyper Active Member
I had no intention to argue, specially on-line and with a woman, not to mention this is their section. I just can't help it sometimes...I say what I think. I promise I will at least try to behave...
Who knows maybe I'll make some actual or ex snipers very busy...
 

Bags

Super Active Member
We all have opinions, we might not all agree with them...but I think we're all adult enough to accept that and as for not arguing with a woman!! :O we make THE best arguments Ha! ;)

Bags :D

ps You should always say what you think, if people don't like it....just learn how to keep taking your foot out of your mouth...I have...
 

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